Friday, January 28, 2011

My problem is that I focus too much on the future instead of living in the now.

DAY 08: A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

Honestly, I have yet to feel completely satisfied with my life. As of right now, I am content with where my life is going but until I get there, I won't be completely satisfied. I am just happy to finally have a direction, as opposed to just wandering around aimlessly like I had done for the first 22 years of my life.

DAY 09: How you hope your future will be

I hope to make enough money that I could live comfortably, without being in debt, and afford to buy the things that I want. I hope to meet the man of my dreams (yes, I believe he is still out there), marry him and have children. Most of all what I want is to just be happy. So many people go through life hating their job, their spouse and overall path they have chosen in life. I vow to never be that person and to wake up each morning thankful for what I have. Of course my life won't be easy, that man and I will probably fight (I mean, he's marrying me) and other obstacles will be thrown my way, but I hope to just keep my head held high through it all.

One of my resolutions for this year is to stop thinking about the future and live in the moment. This has always been a problem of mine, combined with anxiety surrounding what is going to happen. For one, take the situation with Dusty (AKA the new guy, he would understand the name). Things were going pretty well with that, he showed interest in me and treated me very well. Instead of enjoying it -- which I definitely did to an extent -- I constantly thought about what was going to happen. I have no doubt in my mind, based on things that he was saying and how things were going, that it would have eventually evolved into a relationship but now I am not so sure. I just feel that he was different from the rest, yet I did not treat him like that. Instead I treated him as if I was just waiting for him to fuck up and screw me over and never really gave him a chance. In an effort to prevent myself from getting hurt, I managed to push him away and mess up something that could have been great. Unfortunately I cannot change what I have done, all I can do is to just give it time and hope that if it was meant to be, it will happen.


Bethe77 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bethe77 said...

Im sorry i hit the delete by accidnet. I am new and learning. Im stopping in from the Lady blogger society fromt the tea party she is hosting. I love your blog.
May I say do not worry about tomorrow as it will have its own set of adventures tomorrow. Stop and enjoy each new adventure today as you will never recapture this day again. Hard lesson learned for me. Thought I would share. i hope you dont mind. Blessings Nikki!

Kirsty said...

Hi! Just stopped by from the LB tea party. Good luck with your dreams and finding that man! :)

Megan said...

visiting from LBS- Just spent about half an hour reading through your posts...You have a great writing style..very witty and it. xx

Debbie said...

You sound like a younger version of me. I swore that I never wanted to get married and wake up next to my husband thinking "Ugh - him again." This will change and your priorities will too. Don't be in such a rush to find that man - love yourself first and find happiness there. That's my 2 cents. Following you from LBTP.
Debbie from

Grace said...

I think you get what you expect in life. I'm twice your age, and I mean it when I say that it's all good. All of it.

amber01sw said...

When you are thinking about the future that is fine as long as you don't let it completely control everything about the present.Live in the here and now but always set goals! New Follower from Lady Blogger Tea Party, hope you will check my blog and follow me too!

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